Saturday, August 13, 2005

Ode to the Service Drive

*sung to the tune of My Favorite Things*

Grease on the counter and pens that go missing,
Edspections, Jimissions, incessant dissing,
"I’m back didja miss me?" and “I love my job.”
Phones ringing un-til I’m ready to sob…

“Take off this coupon!” “Don’t send me more calls!”
“Let’s have a date.” “Did Pretty Boy just fall?”
Wild men who fly off the handle and scream,
Don’t ask me it’s just a service drive thing…

Gold Team dog bites.
Blue Team shake-ups.
Red Team writer leaves (yay!)
One year in the life of a harried cashier -

Bud's jokes give me baaad dry heaves.

*instrumental interlude*

Irate consumers, the phone calls come faster.
Man shirts with gray pants - a fashion disaster!
Ferrets with dildos, the fun never ends.
A handful of bad boys, some unlikely friends…

"Where are my writers?" The farts and the pranks.
"Parts needs some money." Those ten o'clock smokebreaks.
"Annie I'm busy!" A fight with an ex,
"Detail on line three." Hot Grease Monkey Sex!

When life blew chunks!

When my car crashed!

When my heart went flat.

The service drive antics were what kept me sane...

Stop looking at meeee like that!


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