Saturday, April 29, 2006

What's Your Disorder?

Definition of Schizotypal: Some of the smartest people in history were schizoid because they occupied a remote end of the intelligence bell curve. Schizotypal personality can encompass highly original thinkers as well as totally insane people.

Anyone care to guess which group I fall into? Anyone?

Personality Disorder Test Results
Paranoid |||| 14%
Schizoid |||||||||||| 50%
Schizotypal |||||||||||||||||||| 82%
Antisocial |||||||||| 38%
Borderline |||||| 26%
Histrionic |||||||||| 38%
Narcissistic |||||||||||||||| 62%
Avoidant |||||||||| 38%
Dependent |||| 14%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||| 42%
Take Free Personality Disorder Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Pop-Culture PITA

In the self-torturing department of life I have a habit of using name-brands in my stories. This means I have to spend an hour or so at the Trademarks registry to acknowledge the ownership of said brand names in my books.

Why do I like to do this? I dunno, really, except it lends an authenticity to my books that makes me happy, and to me, it also adds a visuality. I guess some could view it as a lazy shortcut, and me being the woman of few words that I am, maybe it is.

What do you think? Is it lazy to say "She slipped her Ray-Bans over her head like a headband?" When I could say "She slipped her rectangular, tortoise shell sunglasses..." or even simply "her sunglasses..."

I'm just really, really fond of Ray-Ban. First of all, it's the grooviest name for a line of sunglasses ever. EVER. Secondly, it tells a bit about the heroine. And thirdly, the reader forms an immediate picture and can then "see" the scene more clearly.

I've had one or two reviewers complain about my propensity to use name brands. But it's become a part of my style that I'm averse to giving up and I *do* try to limit them to fairly well-known items, or brands which have an importance to the characters livelihood, such as Cessna airplanes.

Am I nuts? How do you handle name brands? Do you avoid them or do you use them with great relish?

Are you a pop-culture PITA like me?

Monday, April 24, 2006

Channeling Sam Kinison

Oh! Oh! Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

These edits have totally kicked my ass to the moon and back. I have, however, rounded the corner. I think.

Still won't be around much this week until I send them off, but wanted to check in and let ya'll know I was still breathing. Barely.

Oh! Oh! Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Hasta la buh bye!

PS--In an I'll be darned moment, I just found out Layover is for sale in a bookshop in London's west end. I'm such an anglophile that this has totally made my day! Ahhhh, the beauty of Google and the WWW.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Friday Feature Presentation: WWII as an online game

Straight from the Carnival of Bad History, allow me to present the funniest thing I've seen in months. I nearly killed myself laughing. Even my teenaged daughter and her geeky friends were peeing themselves. What a way to learn history!


Hitler[AoE] has joined the game.*
*Eisenhower has joined the game.*
*paTTon has joined the game.*
*Churchill has joined the game.*
*benny-tow has joined the game.*
*T0J0 has joined the game.*
*Roosevelt has joined the game.*
*Stalin has joined the game.*
*deGaulle has joined the game.*
Roosevelt: hey sup
T0J0: y0
Stalin: hi
Churchill: hi
Hitler[AoE]: cool, i start with panzer tanks!
paTTon: lol more like panzy tanks
T0JO: lol
Roosevelt: o this fockin sucks i got a depression!
benny-tow: haha america sux
Stalin: hey hitler you dont fight me i dont fight u, cool?
Hitler[AoE]; sure whatever
Stalin: cool
deGaulle: **** Hitler rushed some1 help
Hitler[AoE]: lol byebye frenchy
Roosevelt: i dont got **** to help, sry
Churchill: wtf the luftwaffle is attacking me
Roosevelt: get antiair guns
Churchill: i cant afford them
benny-tow: u n00bs know what team talk is?
paTTon: stfu
Roosevelt: o yah hit the navajo button guys
deGaulle: eisenhower ur worthless come help me quick
Eisenhower: i cant do **** til rosevelt gives me an army
paTTon: yah hurry the fock up
Churchill: d00d im gettin pounded
deGaulle: this is fockin weak u guys suck
*deGaulle has left the game.*
Roosevelt: im gonna attack the axis k?
benny-tow: with what? ur wheelchair?
benny-tow: lol did u mess up ur legs AND ur head?
Hitler[AoE]: ROFLMAO
T0J0: lol o no america im comin 4 u
Roosevelt: wtf! thats bullsh1t u fags im gunna kick ur asses
T0JO: not without ur harbors u wont! lol
Roosevelt: u little biotch ill get u
Hitler[AoE]: wtf
Hitler[AoE]: america hax, u had depression and now u got a huge fockin army
Hitler[AoE]: thats bullsh1t u hacker
Churchill: lol no more france for u hitler
Hitler[AoE]: tojo help me!
T0J0: wtf u want me to do, im on the other side of the world retard
Hitler[AoE]: fine ill clear you a path
Stalin: WTF u arsshoel! WE HAD A FoCKIN TRUCE
Hitler[AoE]: i changed my mind lol
benny-tow: haha
benny-tow: hey ur losing ur guys in africa im gonna need help in italy soon sum1
T0J0: o **** i cant help u i got my hands full
Hitler[AoE]: im 2 busy 2 help
Roosevelt: yah thats right ***** im comin for ya
Stalin: church help me
Churchill: like u helped me before? sure ill just sit here
Stalin: dont be an arss
Churchill: dont be a commie. oops too late
Eisenhower: LOL
benny-tow: hahahh oh sh1t help
Hitler: o man ur focked
paTTon: oh what now biotch
Roosevelt: whos the cripple now lol
*benny-tow has been eliminated.*
benny-tow: lame
Roosevelt: gj patton
paTTon: thnx
Hitler[AoE]: WTF eisenhower hax hes killing all my sh1t
Hitler[AoE]: quit u hacker so u dont ruin my record
Eisenhower: Nuts!
benny~tow: wtf that mean?
Eisenhower: meant to say nutsack lol finger slipped
paTTon: coming to get u hitler u paper hanging hun cocksocker
Stalin: rofl
T0J0: HAHAHHAA
Hitler[AoE]: u guys are fockin gay
Hitler[AoE]: ur never getting in my city
*Hitler[AoE] has been eliminated.*
benny~tow: OMG u noob you killed yourself
Eisenhower: ROFLOLOLOL
Stalin: OMG LMAO!
Hitler[AoE]: WTF i didnt click there omg this game blows
*Hitler[AoE] has left the game*
paTTon: hahahhah
T0J0: WTF my teammates are n00bs
benny~tow: shut up noob
Roosevelt: haha wut a moron
paTTon: wtf am i gunna do now?
Eisenhower: yah me too
T0J0: why dont u attack me o thats right u dont got no ships lololol
Eisenhower: fock u
paTTon: lemme go thru ur base commie
Stalin: go to hell lol
paTTon: fock this sh1t im goin afk
Eisenhower: yah this is gay
*Roosevelt has left the game.*
Hitler[AoE]: wtf?
Eisenhower: sh1t now we need some1 to join
*tru_m4n has joined the game.*
tru_m4n: hi all
T0J0: hey
Stalin: sup
Churchill: hi
tru_m4n: OMG OMG OMG i got all his stuff!
tru_m4n: NUKES! HOLY **** I GOT NUKES
Stalin: d00d gimmie some plz
tru_m4n: no way i only got like a couple
Stalin: omg dont be gay gimmie nuculer secrets
T0J0: wtf is nukes?
T0J0: holy ****holy****hoyl****!
*T0J0 has been eliminated.*
*The Allied team has won the game!*
Eisenhower: awesome!
Churchill: gg noobs no re
T0J0: thats bull**** u fockin suck
*T0J0 has left the game.*
*Eisenhower has left the game.*
Stalin: next game im not going to be on ur team, u guys didnt help me for ****
Churchill: wutever, we didnt need ur help neway dumbarss
tru_m4n: l8r all
benny~tow: bye
Churchill: l8r
Stalin: fock u all
tru_m4n: shut up commie lol
*tru_m4n has left the game.*
benny~tow: lololol u commie
Churchill: ROFL
Churchill: bye commie
*Churchill has left the game.*
*benny~tow has left the game.*
Stalin: i hate u all fags
*Stalin has left the game.*
paTTon: lol no1 is left
paTTon: weeeee i got a jeep
*paTTon has been eliminated.*
paTTon: o sh1t!
*paTTon has left the game.*

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Still Closed!


See you when the edits are done!

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Passings, Anniversaries, Rebirths

Today is the first anniversary of my brother's death, and this is about the time it happened, although I didn't find out until evening. Through too much experience, I've learned that the first anniversaries of such events usually mark a turning point in my grief process. I can no longer say "This time last year he did this or that, or even was." Because this time last year, he was dead.

So, as this day begins, I'll say my final farewells. All the books he advised me on are published. I don't know if I'll ever write about another airline professional again. It seems that chapter in my life has ended along with my brother's life.

However, a new one has begun. Those stories spawned new characters with fresh storylines that veered off into completely unexpected directions. And that, I think, is a metaphor for what life and death are meant to accomplish.

Godspeed, Robbie. You served us well.


But wait.You can't go out looking like that.


That's better!

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Our Day Downtown


Buying Designer Ripoffs on Canal Street.


The Goods


In Federal Plaza


Buh Bye Federal Plaza


A Snooze on The Staten Island Ferry


See you when the edits are done!

Friday, April 14, 2006

Happy Easter!

Here's a spicy little treat for your basket. Alexis is getting rave reviews all over the place!



In other news, I got my promotional pens in the mail yesterday and they're gorgeous. Here's a shout out for 4imprint.com. They did a fantastic job and I think it only took aobut a week! Here's a pic:



Won't be around much this weekend. Tomorrow I'm taking my two children, and a third child we found on the side of the road, to Lower Manhattan for the day. Then it's Easter feast with the in-laws.

Happy Egg hunting!

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

DNA Pest

Picture yourself working in the Customer Service department of a DNA testing center. What sort of questions would you anticipate fielding on an average workday? I would imagine you'd expect to hear sad and tragic wonderings whether a man was the real father of his child. Maybe you'd talk to a few adoptees about health histories. Perhaps you'd explain to a young couple that accountability was not an inherited trait, that they must actually teach their child this rare and greatly prized behavior.

Those are a few things that might filter through the help desk on any given day.

However, this is not just any given day for the folks at GeneTree DNA Testing Center. Here's a brief sample of their email inbox today--

Hi!

What sort of test would you use if you wanted to establish that someone was human and not a space alien?

Thank you!

~A romantic fiction author


*twiddling thumbs*

I wonder why they haven't answered yet.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Can't help myself. I'm addicted!

We're gonna play Corrupted Wishes all week long here. Just like limericks used to do it for me, so does this game. No way can I get enough. Here's the rules:

Person 1 makes a wish
Person 2 grants it, with a hilariously unpleasant twist, then makes a wish of his/her own.
The next person then corrupts THAT wish, and makes his own wish, and so on.

Like so:

Person 1: I wish I had a Maserati.

Person 2: Your wish is granted! You have a Maserati. By Matchbox.
I wish I could fly.

Person 3: Your wish is granted! You can fly! You just can't land.
I wish every day was Christmas Eve.

Person 4: Your wish is granted! Every day IS Christmas Eve--and you're in retail.

You get the drift. I'll go first. Play in comments!

I wish I had tighter abs.

Corrupted Wishes

If you want to have a helluva laugh, head over to Kris Starr's blog and play Corrupted Wishes. Be sure to read the comments!

In other news, I'm expecting the edits for Out Of This World today, so I won't be posting much until they're done.

And oh yeah, time to take more books up to my local bookshop. They're selling like hotcakes! All five of 'em.

Later, taters!

Simon Say Nooooooooo

Well, this sucks. Mandisa got sent home? Mandisa?!? That really came out of left field. And Elliot and Paris in the bottome three??? Gotta wonder what these voters are thinking.

Now I know I'm not supposed to complain if I don't vote. Ef that. I'm complaining.

*whine*

*bitch*

*moan*

I thought for sure it would be the Ace/Katharine/Bucky triad. I want all of them out. All of them I tell you!

I wonder if this is the same group of voters who re-elected Bush.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Where to start on the train wreck that was American Idol last night. Is it me, or is everyone starting to fall apart? It was awful. Beyond awful, actually, with the only good parts being Chris--who really shone, Bucky--in a shocking comeback, and Kelly--who I find extraordinarly annoying but who did do a rockin' good job.

What the hell happened to my main man Taylor? And although I love Elliot's voice, he really needs to ditch the homeless look and get some stylin' threads. Katharine has a bewitching face and smile, but is it me, or is she hopelessly vacuous? Where's the inner light? If she has one, I haven't seen it yet.

I don't know. My vote is leaning toward Chris now. Not that I actually vote. But if I did, he would have it.

And was that really Kenny Rogers? Looks like he's had a total body transplant. I couldn't believe how different he looked from the Kenny I grew up with. Hope he sings The Gambler tonight.

Ciao!

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

And a one and a two and a...

Here's an interesting snippet making it's way around the blogosphere:

Tomorrow, at two minutes and three seconds after 1:00 AM the time and date will be 01:02:03 04/05/06.

Anyone staying up for it? Personally, I think it'd be easier to celebrate 08:09:10 11/12/13 in a few more years.

I realized the other day that I'll turn fifty on 01/11/11 (backwards it's 5+0 the way the 'mericans write it). Mark your calendar cuz there's gonna be a par-tay!

Monday, April 03, 2006

Daylight Ravings

Nothing new to report. Spent the weekend on household chores, and enjoying a Sunday evening sidewalk dining experience in town. Was nice having that extra hour of sunlight on such a beautiful day.

I ordered 300 promotional pens today. They're yellow with orange trim and purple lettering that says Do The World with Ann Wesley Hardin. I've wanted to get some pens for a while now and with RT coming up figured I'd better get a move on.

Promo is always an active topic among authors, especially ebook authors. We debate what to get, what's useful and whether or not any of it really works to get our names out there. For the most part, we all agree that writing more books is the best promo of all. But, there's an expectation in the whole book community for an author to have something to give away as a token of appreciation. Just writing a good book isn't enough anymore. Readers have alot of good books to choose from. So what makes them choose yours? If you find the secret, will you let me know?

I don't think a pen will make anyone buy my book. What I hope it will do, though, is be a keepsake for readers who already enjoy my work. Before I was published, I really got a kick out of using pens my fav authors and mentors gave me. If I can give someone else that kind of charge, then it's worth it.

So, I'm not looking at it as promo. I'm looking at it as furthering a relationship. And from that perspective, my wallet ain't hurting quite so bad ;)