Friday, October 13, 2006

Gestation Frustration

Every journey of fifty-thousand words begins with the first word.

You know, I carried and labored with my children for longer than the bell curve and it seems like my stories gestate longer too. I can't tell you how frustrating that can be as I watch friends who started after me zooming ahead with the number of books they release, with a seeming ease of productivity that startles me (even though I know for a fact that they sweat).

But, I guess that's what makes the reward so rich when it all finally clicks. Today I heard the click and I'm celebrating!

As I lay down for my nap earlier, my mind was racing. Where was this story going? How would it end? How in bloody hell could I resolve all the issues? Where was the illuminated path in the tangled forest of my mind? I needed it so badly to forge ahead without beating the bushes every single time I sat down at the keyboard. Where was my theme dammit!

Finally, finally, I connected all the dots. All the seemingly inconsequential things my fingers added to the story (with no help from me), including and especially the setting and some of the cultural and scientific phenomena that occur in that region, all sort of jostled into line and a glorious picture emerged.

*deep, satisfied sigh*

And I absolutely love it to pieces! It's such a high when that happens. I'm always grateful when it does because there's always that fear that it won't. But I still wish my gestations weren't so frustrating. I wish writing wasn't so painful until the real story emerged.

I guess, despite all effort to the contrary, I just haven't totally accepted my whacked out process yet. Do you think it's because I don't understand it?

Ideas? Anyone? This frustrated gestator wants to know!

Are we there yet?

*
Yo! I just read that Lisa Valdez postponed her sequel to Passion for two years because she wanted it to be perfect. She is now my poster child and hero. (Don't worry, though, Bree. I won't pull a Lisa ;)

1 Comments:

Anonymous Heather *Rae* Scott said...

I'm rowing in the same boat as you, but you know what? That's okay. We'll do it. We'll find our rythm and do it. I have the utmost faith in you, Ann.

xx

October 16, 2006 1:48 PM  

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