Friday, June 27, 2008

Top Ten Penalties We Really Need, NOW

1) $1,000 for opening the rental car window and then not knowing how to close the rental car window.

2) $500 for messing with the tire pressure because the rental car "drove differently".

3) Forgot your EZ Pass and blew through the toll gate thinking nothing bad would happen: $2,000

4) Unable to locate the gas tank/headlights/brakes in the rental car: Suspended license.

5) Unable to figure out the controls in the same make/model you own because the rental car is a different color: Loss of license.

6) $3000 if you accuse us of not disclosing that you could NOT:
  • Go airborne with the rental car
  • Let your dog drive the rental car
  • Tow a Semi with a rope looped around the rental car's bumper
  • Use the rental car as a boat
7) Complaining that it costs $31.99 a day to rent a $40,000 vehicle, but gladly forking over $4.50 to rent a $20 movie: Seven Benjamins.

8) $4500 for asking why we need to see your drivers license.

9) $5500 for getting mad that you can't drive without one.

10) If you can't start the rental car because the steering wheel is locked and you don't know how to unlock it,

and...and...

*drumroll*

When informed that the steering wheel is locked, you say that you didn't realize it could be moved to the other side of the rental car!: Full price of the vehicle, plus, we relieve your home of large appliances and sharp objects, and alert child services for the safety of your offspring.

Your Friday Feature challenge: Guess the scenario that did NOT happen in real life.

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Sunday, June 15, 2008

The Incredible Shrinking Womb Mass

FabDame's cancer markers are below normal!! She is kicking some serious tumor ass. Give her a cheer!

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Thursday, June 12, 2008

Vox Bleating in Deserto

2 busy 2 blog 4 now.

Friday, June 06, 2008

Acktion!

I wanted to blog this week. Really I did! Where did the time go? Gah.

Got my ARC edits for Bonded and handed them in, worked 40 plus hours, proudly watched Child Number One snag one of only four underclassmen awards at her HS -- she won a bookstore gift card for being the most energetic and enthusiastic female Social Studies student! -- filled my car with gasoline (yikes), helped Dennis pick out a sofa and flat screen TV (a rollicking good time I'll blog about at some point) and blah, blah, blah.

Tomorrow it's into NYC for a visit with Best Peeps. Next week I'm gonna start a new book. Yes, I am. Come hell or high water!

What's on the agenda for you?